Funny
An Apology for Bringing the Squirrel into Church
Dear Members of First Self-Righteous Church, I write this with a humbled heart, a sore back, and a memory that replays in vivid, chaotic detail. I must apologize for bringing that squirrel into your church last Sunday. Every shriek, hallelujah, and blush-worthy confession began with my decision. I take full responsibility.
By Tim Carmichaelabout 7 hours ago in Humor
The MAGA-thon: Spite, Saturated Fats, and the Spin Cycle of Doom
The air in the "Spin Cycle" studio at the local gym was thick with the scent of organic citrus floor cleaner and the collective, desperate sweat of a dozen people trying to outrun their own bad decisions and mortality. But for Brenda, it smelled like treason. It smelled like a deep-state, gluten-free, avocado-toast-eating, woke communist conspiracy, that was personally trying to steal her breath and destroy her life.
By Meko James about 17 hours ago in Humor
Inside the Mind of Dr. Tina Quartz: Healer, Hoax, or Just Really Into Mason Jars?
You’ve heard the name whispered across candlelit kombucha bars. You’ve seen her quotes tattooed in Comic Sans on the backs of people named Trysten. You may have even enrolled, accidentally, in one of her courses after clicking on an ad that said: “Unlock Your Aura’s Credit Score.”
By The Pompous Post3 days ago in Humor
The Taco Tantrum and the Tattoo Hottie
The humidity in Cancun was thick enough to chew, a wet wool blanket of air that smelled of overpriced coconut oil and impending social collapse. I sat perched on a bar stool, my nerve endings firing like a short-circuited pinball machine. Across from the bar, at the pool sat Brenda—a woman who wore her political convictions like a suit of armor and treated a beef taco like a religious sacrament.
By Meko James 3 days ago in Humor
The Sex Safe!
Yes, we all know how important it is to practice safe sex...or at least, safer sex (I seriously doubt that any sex can truly be safe; cameras and eyewitnesses have a funny habit of sneaking up on you), but we are human, and often, like a woman caught in a rainstorm, we suddenly feel odd sensations we cannot control, and end up getting very wet...on a good day.
By Kendall Defoe 3 days ago in Humor
Lunar Vuitton: Why Space Needs Fashion More Than Oxygen
“One small step for man, one fierce strut for mankind.” – Naomi Armstrong (probably) Friends, readers, celestial wanderers… we must address the glaring oversight in modern space exploration: the complete and utter lack of fashion-forward thinking beyond our stratosphere.
By The Pompous Post6 days ago in Humor
You Will Go Up!
I love decorating sometimes. I hate it when things go wrong, and I hate getting on ladders. My husband has disabilities that can cause some distressing symptoms, which can cause him to unknowingly hurt me at night. Due to this, I needed a safe space to sleep and somewhere to focus on myself during the day.
By Carol Ann Townend7 days ago in Humor
I Am Your Neighbor From Upstairs, and I’m Tired of Your Noise Complaints
Hello there, neighbor. I met our landlord today, and he greeted me with yet another one of your noise complaints. Why do you keep doing this to me? We had such a good start: remember the first year, when you went on vacation and asked me to feed your cats?
By Sasha Desideri11 days ago in Humor
