Swipe Right, Lose Your Mind: My Unfiltered Tinder Diaries You Won’t Believe

So… here I am.

About a month ago, I decided I’d download Tinder and start meeting people. My plan was simple: talk to guys from all over the world, open up my perspective, have conversations with better and better-looking men—and who knows, maybe I’d even land a handsome sugar daddy or something. Or a young athlete. I mean, the world is big. And yeah, sugar daddies can be hot—but as the saying goes, 'I have adult money.'

So overall, I think it’s great when people use dating apps—Tinder, Grindr, Planet Romeo, Badoo, and so on.

But.

Yeah… I kind of killed everything.

Because here’s the situation: these apps are killing communication. They’re killing physical attraction. You can swipe left and right, throw in a super like, whatever—but in the end, you’re just swiping on a picture. Or on a short text. A personality that, realistically, is about 50–50 whether it’s even true.

And I decided that since in the past month—and honestly even before that—I’ve had so many ridiculous, unbelievable, and often hilarious experiences with dating, conversations, both online and offline… I just *have* to share them. Seriously, it’s the kind of stuff where you think, okay, everyone knows there are weird people out there—but THIS?

At this point, instead of collecting Infinity Stones, I’m collecting idiots.

So yeah—this series, Swipe Stories, will be exactly that. I’ll tell one dating story at a time, sometimes in multiple parts, because there are a lot. I’ll focus on one person per post—I’m not bringing anyone back, they don’t deserve that much attention.

This is basically an introduction: what my dating life looks like as a 22-year-old gay guy in Hungary—online, through apps, in person, at clubs, through friendships… everywhere.

So yeah, I’m about to tear apart my love life.

In a funny, sarcastic way.

Let’s start with one of my favorites from August. Let’s call him Máté.

Actually… no. That name is too good for him. Let’s call him Archibald. Not a very Hungarian name, but hey—it works.

So, Archibald and I matched on Tinder. We both swiped right. He was a relatively good-looking guy, a bit on the chubbier side, kind of soft—but I saw pictures of him in suits and shirts, so I thought, okay. Shared interest: politics.

Yes—our dear boy was aiming for a political career, involved in some international youth organizations.

But.

He wasn’t out. Secretly bisexual. And of course, he was “just looking for friendship” and all that.

We talked for about a day and a half, maybe two. I told him honestly: I don’t want anything beyond friendship. He was a nice-looking guy and all, but I can’t deal with someone who isn’t out. I want to be free. Don’t get me wrong—I have no issue with people who aren’t out yet. But I’m 22, and I can’t even find a decent guy among people who are out, let alone those who aren’t.

I’m sure they exist—I just don’t find them.

So yeah, that was the situation. There was this guy, Archibald, very likeable at first. We didn’t actually have that many things in common. The common ground was more like… okay, maybe a friends-with-benefits kind of thing.

And I was open to that. I do believe in meeting in person. Actually, I prefer it. If someone wants something, let’s meet. I hate when people just send pictures of their dick.

It’s disgusting.

As a human being, that’s just low.

Now, don’t get me wrong—there’s a difference. There are amazing photographers who can create artistic nude photos. Yes, sometimes a penis is visible. And it can be incredibly sexy. Just like a black-and-white artistic nude of a woman, or any tasteful nude photography—it can be powerful and beautiful.

But just pulling it out and sending a random picture? No.

If I’m getting to know someone properly, and maybe I want to sleep with them—or they want to sleep with me—then at least have the decency not to send that. Let’s meet. The in-person impression is completely different. And if that works, then we can move on to the real impression.

I genuinely don’t understand this. I’m 22, this is my generation—and it’s all about dick pics, nudes, girls sending pictures of their boobs… where are we living?

Yes, it’s sexy. Yes, we like it. Sure.

But wouldn’t it be even hotter if you meet someone, you like them in person, and then things happen naturally?

And don’t get me wrong—I’m not a prude. One-time things happen, sure. Everyone decides for themselves what that means emotionally. That’s fine.

But let’s not pretend sex is better just because you saw in advance what the other person is working with.

I mean—I don’t even know how to properly describe female anatomy, I’m gay, so… I’m not exactly a professional in vaginas. Ladies, my apologies.

The point is: no.

We’re adults, and we don’t know how to experience intimacy. We ruin it with dick pics and random explicit content. And it’s not healthy. It’s really not.

So yeah—this guy sent it.

After three or four days.

Even though I had clearly told him: don’t send anything like that, or I’m done.

He had already been sending half-naked pictures—shirtless, showing his body. We’re in a similar weight category, honestly. I’ve got some extra weight too. And people say, whether it’s men or women, it’s nice when there’s something to hold onto.

Not when it’s completely out of control—but hey, everyone has their preference.

So I thought, okay, decent upper body. Not perfect—I’m not perfect either—but fine. Could work. A mutually beneficial situation. Not in a toxic way, but in a consensual, respectful, friends-with-benefits dynamic.

Exploring sexuality while still being young—but not that young anymore.

And then—three or four days later—he sent a full picture.

And honestly… something just broke in me.

Not because of size—I’m not obsessed with that—but because of everything he had been saying before. Talking about how he’d pick me up, throw me onto the bed like some dominant beast…

Yeah. The picture didn’t exactly support that image.

So I said: thank you, but I’d like to end this.

His response? “What’s wrong? Come over, baby.”

Right. Let’s start with the fact that you just sent me something I explicitly asked you not to. Also—you live 80 kilometers away. You have a car, I don’t. You should come here.

And yes, I would’ve gone too—it’s mutual interest, after all. Let’s put our little LEGO pieces together, right?

But I didn’t go.

And the reason is simple: he sent it.

That’s exactly why.

Because dating is so much better when you’re not objectifying someone. When there’s still curiosity. When you think, okay—what will it be like? What will they be like?

Respecting boundaries is incredibly important. This applies to both requested and unsolicited images. What is okay for the other person? What isn’t?

If you send something and they don’t like it—don’t get offended if they criticize it. I mean, come on—if you’re the one showing it off, what do you expect?

Wouldn’t it be better if they saw it in person? Maybe they’d be shocked—but at least there’s still a chance for a polite rejection. Or maybe, if there’s already chemistry, they just don’t care and you both enjoy the moment anyway.

But this? This is childish. There’s no communication.

So guys—seriously—if someone tells you what they want, respect it. If you can’t, then just unmatch. That’s it.

And don’t even get me started on when nobody writes after matching and the conversation dies before it even begins—that’s a whole other topic.

We really need to do better. Treat each other properly. We’re human beings. Some people want love. Some want to fall in love. Some want to be loved. Others just want sex.

All of that is fine.

But respecting each other’s limits? That’s essential.

Because right now, it’s either extreme: people are either overly reserved or way too loose. There’s no middle ground.

And honestly, I see this pattern especially in the gay community—but it applies to everyone: heterosexual, bisexual, everyone.

So if you don’t want to see it—block it.

If you don’t want to send it—don’t send it.

If someone asks you not to—respect that.

Simple.

Also, just saying—in Austria, there are already serious legal consequences for sending explicit images without consent. And honestly? Fair enough.

Yes, it can be abused—but the solution is simple: don’t take those pictures in the first place.

If you really want to show someone—make them *want* to see it. Build attraction. Earn that moment.

Because this isn’t like sending homework or copying notes from a screenshot.

This is completely different.

So please—stop sending each other your dicks, vaginas, boobs, asses, toys, whatever.

It’s intimate. It belongs between two people—or within a shared space where everyone consents.

That’s my opinion on dick pics.

And dear Archibald—too bad you blocked me.

But I hope your compass has found its direction by now.

Literally.